Bouncing Back When Things Go Wrong

Everybody runs into setbacks. Resilience is the ability to cope with stress, adjust when things go sideways, and get back on your feet afterward. Some people seem to come by it more easily than others, but anyone can build it up. Here’s what I’d focus on.

Treat setbacks as temporary

This is what people mean by a growth mindset. When something goes wrong, try to see it as a setback that will pass, and maybe as something you can learn from. Easier said than done, I know. But if you can get even a little curious about a problem, it tends to feel less scary, and you’re less likely to dig in your heels and fight it.

Have people in your corner

Friends, family, a therapist or a coach. You want people who will listen, tell you how things look from the outside, and encourage you when you’re struggling. It helps a lot to have somebody you can call.

Take care of yourself

Yoga, meditation and journaling are a few things that can help you manage stress and feel steadier. Pick whatever works for you and keep at it, especially when it’s the first thing you’re tempted to drop.

Go easy on yourself

When you’re having a hard time, listen to how you talk to yourself. A lot of us are much harsher with ourselves than we’d ever be with a friend. Try giving yourself the same kindness and patience you’d give them. That can make it easier to pick yourself up and try again.